Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Allow me to say this

I don't enjoy doing my PhD. At least not now....

.... when reagents are finishing.
.... when we haven't received (or not going to receive?) any $$ to fund our lab.
.... when my paper got rejected months ago, and I worked to get sufficient data to pool them in, yet to find that they are rubbish, and that i'm just wasting more reagents.
.... when I know there's a lot more to be done 

Go away 'filling up knowledge gap, contributing to science...'
I just want to get over with the whole PhD thing!
I don't like the feeling now
Hanging in between, neither here nor there
Doubting my own ability
Doubting my initial decision

(Hmm...what will Buddha do if He's in my situation?)

p/s: Please forgive me for being negative. I just need an exit out. I'll be fine. And don't worry, I'm still hanging on.

3 comments:

wen ni said...

this is the comment i posted before. Now posted to you:
"my pastor told me something that is very meaningful. only with "faith" can drive a person's commitment and life long interest onto something. In science, we need this "faith" to re-do, re-search, re-think and eventually that will be something valubale come out finally. So keep going!!"

Jia you

lulu_ma said...

wen ni: thanks. i've written so many encouraging words for myself about research here in this blog. but this time maybe it's good to scribble some negative thoughts out. then i'll be reminded how i finally walk my way out when i look back one day. haha

cklim said...

sure you have right to say this:p that's what a blog for!

It's common for us to encounter these situations.

we learn from obstacles, and help us to move forward :p

everything is going to be fine soon

all the best

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...