Viva

A card and quilled flower handmade by a dear friend who came just before I had my viva. It's lucky that we have each other along this journey.

14 April 2015 will be a memorable day. Yes, it will. It is the day I survived my viva and been given the 'green light' to be awarded PhD and graduate this year. It is not yet the end, as there are still corrections to be made to improve my thesis quality but soon I'll come out alive of the tunnel!

I'm writing everything down while my memory is still fresh. What's the journey without this bit of event right?

The entire viva process lasted about 2 hour plus. I gave a presentation of about 30 mins, and then the examiners kicked off the Q & A session which lasted for a full 1 hour or more. Later, I was invited to leave the room for the examiners to discuss and came out with a decision of whether I'm up to the standard to receive a PhD.

The Q & A session lasted thaaaaaaaaaat long, without me realizing it. I was pretty nervous at the beginning because the first question that was raised is about the latest update of my subject matter which I have no idea and unaware of. I felt like 'oh I'm doomed!' But the questions didn't just stop there and I had no time to linger too long but to move on. On overall, I get a good mix of questions (although I couldn't answer all of them but I tried my best and be frank when I really didn't know the anwers). Some about the research field, the subject matters, some to test my basics in molecular biology, and some asking for the rationale and reasons for making certain choices in the study. I was still nervous towards the end. But I think I kinda relaxed a bit in between when the questions turned to the technical aspect of my work which I'm more familiar with. It feels more like a discussion in its sense when you have the experts (examiners) who understand what you are doing to give you constructive suggestions and to critically comment on your techniques, data and analyses. It's like learning from the masters, and that sort of made me forget about my fear.  

After the long wait (which is actually only 20 mins or more but it feels so long), I was finally called into the room once again. The chairman then read out my name, and said 'congratulations, .....'. All I heard is the word 'congratulations', and I could start feeling tears in my eyes. I didn't catch whatever that he's saying, as I was fighting to not let my tears drop but I guess it's an emotional moment that I couldn't help but shed tears finally. It's the tears of joy, of all the hardwork, the sleepless nights, the stress, the time when you doubted yourself, the ups and downs.. all expressed at once in drops of tears. It's also the feeling that someone (the examiners) understands what you did, and congratulated you on the job you did, who appreciates the difficulties and limitations that you've went through to get here. I really felt a great sense of gratitude towards my examiners.

Also I was glad that my supervisor was there in the room with me. Initially I was actually a bit reluctant to have him there to witness my viva, as I felt it might cause me more stress. Ended up that it was great that he's there, sitting behind me, like a silence support to back me up. It's more like a spiritual kind of encouragement than physically. He said some words to the examiners when they congratulated him for his first PhD student (and I guess sort of indirectly telling me) which I couldn't recall exactly but the overall message is that I've been quite independent in my work, and his role has been more like a motivation coach giving me encouragements and boost my confidence etc. That really meant a lot to me. I guess I could assume that he's proud of me? Hahaha! Anyway, he told me later in whatsapp when I wanted to make an appointment to meet him to discuss about my thesis correction that reads 'Congrats, you did very well for the viva. The examiners were impressed with your knowledge and ability to answer questions.' Wow, that really makes all the stressful days and nights worthwhile!

Although I've written 2 pages of acknowledgement in my thesis, I'll again express my gratitude here:

Firstly, to my supervisor Dr Ed. For his guidance and mentorship, and for believing in me.
Secondly, to my pals Nana and Ringo and my sis Horsey. For all the nagging, encouragements, 软硬兼施，威逼利诱 to get me to write my thesis (when I procrastinated), submitted it, prepared for viva.
Thirdly, to my husband. For his understanding, love and support. For helping to take care of our boy when I needed time to prepare for my viva. And for nagging me all the time to finish my thesis.
Forth, my parents and my in laws. For understanding my situation and providing support whenever I needed them.  
Last but not least, to my reverends, who gave me encouragements and who keep me in their prayers. 

May you all be well and happy.